Family is a concept which has become increasing difficult to define. The idea of what a family is can differ from person to person. There was a time when a family was strictly defined as two parents (mother and father), their biological children, and extended relatives. Today, the family dynamic is considerably more complicated and its boundaries can seem endless.
If one were to open photo albums of a dozen families in 1955, and compare them to families in 2009; there would be a considerably different look to the individuals and the roles they play. Step-parents are almost as numerous as biological parents. Step-siblings, half-siblings, and all the corresponding relationships and associations, can be overwhelming and confusing. There may be difficulty in finding a name for some of the relationships due to the newness of the phenomenon of the blended family. There may be a great deal of confusion surrounding the new idea of family. For instance, what does an adult child call their new relatives? How far-reaching do these new extended relationships go? Extended family can include step-grandparents, step-aunts and uncles. How is an adult child supposed to refer to the mother of their half-siblings? There is no limit to the possibility for confusion and discomfort.
Adult children may find these transitions and new relationships especially difficult to absorb and integrate into their lives. They may have their own families and a full spectrum of activities and issues to deal with. Parents divorcing and dating others can be difficult for adult children to accept or understand. Remarriage can bring extreme feelings as well. Add to that, half-siblings, who are as young as their own children, can be a source of embarrassment or resentment. The ability to accept a remarriage after the death of a parent, and the subsequent introduction of step-siblings may seem impossible. Not having grown up with step-siblings can make them feel like complete strangers, who are suddenly expected to be a family.
Whether it is through divorce and remarriage, or the death of a parent; adult children may feel resentful and disconnected from their parent and the new spouse. Being an adult does not insulate one entirely from the complicated feelings and mixed-emotions which accompany these situations. It may be painful to discuss feelings with family members; and the desire to avoid the new family dynamic may cause rifts or periods of no communication. In some cases, this need for distance can alleviate itself. Time and space is often necessary for adult children to adjust to the new environment. Each person and each family will have their own way to handle and cope with familial changes.
Becoming a step-grandparent can present its own difficulties as well. When adult children marry a person with children, it can be uneasy for the children and the adults to forge the role of step-grandparent. As with most situations, honest discussion and sincere kindness can help to work through the initial period of awkwardness, and transition beautifully into a loving relationship.
Parents of adult children should reach out with love and honesty to with their children, and step-children, and find ways to blend the families reasonably and sensibly for all concerned. There are resources and literature on the subject; and professional counseling may be beneficial for those who are experiencing prolonged detachment from their family members.
Writing exams is sometimes a problem for students, but there are some suggestions which can help students to make better exams.
Before the exam, check the time and place of the exam to be punctual and sleep and eat well. And don’t drink too much alcohol the day before, that’s the worst thing you can do before an exam!
During the exam, read everything first, underlining important words and the instructions. Many students feel initially that they cannot answer any questions adequately, but this is a common reaction. In this point, relax is very important. Then, the order to answer the questions is: easy, favourite and, finally, difficult. Another advice is to answer all the questions because the first 50% of marks are easier to obtain than the next 50%.
A very important point is to plan the answer. Perhaps you think it is stupid, but don’t forget to read the instructions carefully! Use about 10 minutes to plan the words and sentences to answer the questions. Think: ‘is the answer logically explained?’ and ‘am I answering to all important points?’
When you write your answers, check the language you are using. Did you forget to write any subject (for example, ‘it’)? Did you forget the famous third-person ‘s’? Is the word order in your sentence good? Are you sure about the spelling of a particular word? A language exam is not a honesty exam and you will not be penalised if you tell the examiners that you are twenty-nine years old because your don’t know how to say or write thirty.
If you have to do a multiple-choice exercise (a, b, c or d) don’t forget that examiners can choose the same letter successively for the correct answer. Many students start to feel confused and worried and they choose another letter. Don’t do that! Your comprehension is more important than the order of letters. If the multiple-choice exercise is based on a text, don’t choose and option just because the same word appears in the question and in the text. This type of exercise is used to check your comprehension of ideas, not of single words.
Be relaxed in the speaking exam. The questions and topics you have to speak about are normally based on you and on the activities you have done in your course. Meet your oral exam partner to speak about the topics you've covered in class. And of course, make sure you understand your examiner’s instructions well. If not, you can always ask for clarifications!
The most important thing in the listening test is concentration. Read the options and instructions carefully. Examiners sometimes give options which match more or less the information from the recording. For example, a person says that she is going to be late for the meeting and the question is: T/F Finally, she was late for the meeting. What would you answer?
Hi everyoneThe title of this story is ‘One of the Lads’ and it suggests a story about a gang of young boys who study in the same school.
The story is about Luke Thomas, a
The story I’ve written about is “The old oak bowl”. It’s about an English man called Robert Walker who is a history schoolteacher. He is old, and his life is a bit boring. Robert thinks that people have to behave properly all the time. This is the reason why he doesn’t say his opinions about some topics. For example, he firmly believes that English people are only the people who have English ancestors.
In the story, we can see how he thinks and how he acts in different situations. His favourite hobby is to restore old wooden pieces. In fact, although he restores a lot of other people’s objects, he doesn’t accept any money and only says “it’s just my little hobby”. In one of these cases, a woman gave him an old oak bowl from about the thirteenth century, and Robert fell in love with it.
That night he had a dream. There was a monk with the bowl. It contained some herbs and the monk was speaking a strange language. When he told his dream to another history teacher, the teacher told him that the language the monk was speaking was probably French, because in 1066 there was a Norman invasion and a lot of foreigners arrived to
In my opinion, it is a good story because it shows the main character’s personality very well and his beliefs about an actual and controversial topic: immigration. It shows us different points of view about it and I think this is a very good thing. The language is not very difficult and it can be easily understood. In conclusion, I recommend you to read this story.
THE NATIONAL PASSION
On the Continent, if people are waiting at a bus stop they loiter around in a seemingly vague fashion. […] An English man, even if he is alone, forms and orderly queue of one.
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At weekends an Englishman queues up at the bus stop, travels out to Richmond, queues up for a boat, then queues up for tea, then queues up for ice cream, then joins a few more odd queues just for the sake of the fun of it, then queues up at the bus stop and has the time of his life.
Many English families spend lovely evenings at home just by queueing up for a few hours, and the parents are very sad when the children leave them and queue up for going to bed.
